A recent survey found that, although married couples or couples say they are happier as they have more sex, the benefits of sex once a week are no longer increasing. Those who did it four times a week or more did not behave happier than those who did it once a week.
Amy Muise, a post-doctoral researcher on gender relations at Dalhousie University in Canada, said: “My confirmation is that if you always try to increase the frequency of sexual life as much as possible, the couple or the couple will eventually feel stressed.” Once “may be a more realistic goal, and people who force themselves to have sex every day will feel too stressed and eventually let go.” Muse is the organizer of the survey, and the research results were published in the Social Psychological and Personality Science journal in November last year.
Muse’s research found that the reason that sexual life enhances happiness is that it makes people feel more satisfied in their partnership. The data for this study came from two different groups, including the 2,400 couples in the National Survey of Families and Households.
“The quality of a relationship is one of the most important factors in predicting a person’s happiness,” said Muse. “Sexual life more than a week may not improve a relationship, but doing so also No harm. “
However, Muse said the survey had two flaws. First of all, it is not clear whether sex and happiness are chickens or eggs. It is possible that a happier relationship brings sex at least once a week, rather than a happy life. It is also possible that both statements are true: sexual life and happiness are mutually reinforcing.
Another drawback is that while living once a week may be appropriate for some people, it may be too large or too small for others. “Of course, it’s better for some couples to have less sex, but for other couples to have sex more than once a week can make them happy,” Muse said.
So, what frequency of sexual life is appropriate for us? Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist from Berlin, said: “The advantage of this type of article is that it provides a communication platform about sex.” For some couples, they may not think about sex. The question of frequency of life may be a sign that they already feel intimate and content, or it may be too busy to take care of.
Ma Lin did not set a specific number for the sexual frequency of the partner, because each couple is different, so Ma Lin wants them to try it themselves. “I am a fan of client experiments. You can try it twice a week or once a week in the first month and see how it works. You can control it.”
For those lucky couples who are satisfied with the frequency of their sex lives, studies have shown that they do not want to change. Researchers asked couples six times a month to double the frequency, but at the end of the third month, couples who doubled the frequency of their emotions were worse than those who maintained the same frequency, and did not enjoy sex as much as before.
George Loewenstein, a professor of economics and psychology at Carnegie Mellon University and lead author of the study, said: “It’s always not so pleasant to be told to do something.” Another reason to recommend sex to couples is to worry that they will lose interest because they don’t meet expectations.
But Rowanstein believes that the bigger problem is “couples who haven’t had sex for a long time” compared to couples who think they don’t have enough sex. For these couples, Rowanstein said, he thinks “once a week is a good end goal … the frequency is almost like a natural constant.”
Even though these couples who lack sexuality want to increase their frequency, they may already lack desire for their partners. These couples can try traditional strategies, such as scheduling more high-quality time for the two and trying to change the scene. “Couples can try things they haven’t experienced before, such as changing to a new hotel in a new setting and new location, and your partner will look very different, and it’s not good for sex,” Rowanstein said. “(Alternatively, trying some sex toys full of freshness can also greatly stimulate sexual interest.)
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