The doll is fake, the company is real

Currently, China is the world’s largest producer of silicone dolls. There is a small but secretive group of people who not only use dolls as adult products, but also love grooming and taking photos of them, known as “baby friends”. Zhang bo, four years old, is one of them. He has a baby called “sakura”, but never has sex with it, but treats it as his daughter. The doll is fake, but the company is real.

Zhang bo, a 35-year-old product planner, has a hidden identity: “uncle piling” — a god who has raised children for four years. He is the once popular net post “small butterfly and uncle one day” publisher. At most, zhang bo owned six silicone dolls.

Under the gazebo, by the river, by the tree… The silicone doll that everybody impression regards as adult thing, become the “little girl” that is dressed up meticulously, swagger ground goes out to the street, take a picture. Groups like this who document their daily lives with their dolls are called baby friends. To get into the world of “baby friends,” we contacted a few foster parents, but they all declined interview requests.

Later, we found “uncle piling” and after a year of communication, he finally agreed to be interviewed. “Just thinking that some people can’t speak, and I’ll speak for them… It’s a very private thing to put on the table and let people see what the truth is and what’s going on. Why the idea… “

The physical doll was originally an inflatable doll, invented by Hitler during world war ii to combat sexually transmitted diseases in the military, and perfected by the United States and Japan. In the 1990s, people began to use advanced medical non-toxic soft silica gel or PVC material to make inflatable dolls. In recent years, with the development of technology and the expansion of market space, silica gel dolls have been infinitely close to real people.

Currently, China is the world’s largest producer of silicone dolls. Foreign silicone dolls start at 30,000 yuan, while domestic ones are relatively affordable, ranging from 5,000 yuan to 20,000 yuan. Aside from sex, silicone dolls are also a spiritual antidote to many of the world’s baby friends. As for zhang bo, the doll is “a carrier of one’s own emotional sustenance.”

From heartache to nothing

“If I haven’t been hurt by girls in real life, or had conflicts with them, I don’t think it’s that good to have beautiful girls’ hands, people, paper characters, or virtual characters.”

Zhang bo, born in 1984, is a native of Beijing. Compared with many young love peers, zhang bo has been on the relationship between men and women. At the age of 19, he first began to have different feelings for girls. It was a tall, thin girl with glasses, her skin a little darker, her mother dead, her family not very well. “And I, after I know her history, I don’t know how it happened, I feel so poor, but it seems so lovely, and suddenly I have a thought that I will take care of you.”

Facing the girl, zhang bo tasted for the first time the taste of heartache. Zhang bo, a beginner in love, is sure to get the girl. “It seems to me that your house is so good, and all the conditions are so good… I think I have an advantage, I have confidence, I just feel like this girl, it’s easier to pursue.”

However, before zhang bo vindicated, the girl quickly had a boyfriend — the other side is a left a level, a little older than them boys, “maybe a little more mature” — “miscalculated combat capacity,” zhang bo said to comfort himself.

The first secret love so no end, after entering the university, zhang bo again frustrated in the feelings. He tried to do all he could to be nice to the girl, but he couldn’t. One failure after another, like a bludger, will have the advantage of him, hit back to the original. “One of my classmates brought me a magazine with an advertisement for the doll in it. I look at this thing hundreds of thousands of dollars. The classmate say, in the future you buy this, I very angry, I say I buy not to buy with you what relation ah, I am willing to buy again how can?”

That is zhang bo’s first contact with silicone doll, the price of a hundred thousand also let him some surprise. “The classmate took this as a joke, but I seriously considered and calculated what was going on, such as why it was expensive, who would buy it, whether I would buy it if I had money, and when I would have money.”

“Life is like a pass”

As rocky as zhang bo’s emotional history was, so was his career path. In the years after graduating from college, zhang bo suffered setbacks at work. After resigning from the propaganda department of a state-owned enterprise arranged by his parents, he sent his resume to a small gaming start-up. In five years, I changed jobs six or seven times, but I could not find a suitable position in every company. “My view of the work these years, a bit of no desire, no peace, no goal… We have an uncle downstairs at the door who is always walking around with a bottle of wine, and whenever he sees me, he always has to say something, and I think I might as well do it in the future.”

Until one day, zhang bo met a sichuan girl in the Internet bar. She always plays the game skillfully by herself and looks lonely. Zhang bo’s heart was hit again, fierce pursuit has not been waiting for the other side to respond. “One day, she suddenly came to me, she said you so badass beat me, then you go straight to a few house basement to have a look.”

Enter the place that girl lives, zhang bo just discovers, that “really is the life of north drift” : girl and companion live in the partition room that now appears to have been “built illegally”, crowded room, in addition to daily necessities, have a small television in the corner only. Perhaps the girl just wanted to tell zhang bo the reality of the gap between the two, but this is more inspired zhang bo’s desire to protect. “When I looked at the situation, the feeling returned, and I said I must get her out of here and make her better off than she is.”

After all, two people love each other without hesitation, and the first to stand up against, is zhang bo’s parents. Finally all the contradictions broke out in a fierce quarrel, zhang bo moved to his girlfriend’s basement with a roll of bedding. The rent of 1800 yuan, common bathroom, natural gas are not connected to the room, every night, the window car lock car when the taillight directly through the curtain into the room, people do not sleep soundly. Around the “beipiao” people are puzzled by zhang bo’s arrival: a good Beijing man, do not go home to live here?

In the face of people’s understanding, zhang bo is happy. Zhang bo felt that he had finally met the most suitable person: “I am the most ideal and perfect person. I can get my own value by helping her. She is my best girlfriend, this person.”

In the crowded and dark basement, zhang bo is determined to take on the responsibilities of a man and give his girlfriend the best future. He began to go out and start his own business, earning 4,000 yuan a month. But the reality gave zhang bo a loud slap in the face, business failure, not only did not earn money, even social security also cut off.

“Just because of the problem of social security, mom has a little breakdown, just think you are with her, she gave you what, you are now a Beijing child even social security can not pay, do you understand? In her eyes, this does not belong to people, lost the qualification of life.”

Zhang bo understood that life is like a pass, love is only the first step, the next step should consider back responsibility, marriage, marriage to consider children, after the child, is the growth of children, raising…… “Do you have to save in this economy… We looked at each other. Isn’t that difficult?”

Zhang bo is powerless to find that he wanted to give each other a better life, but ended up unable to even protect themselves, the harsh reality of both suffering. In the summer of 2015, my girlfriend went back to her hometown, thus ending the three-year relationship.

I have a girl in my house.

Love is gone, the career is gone, zhang bo’s life drops bottom. He bought the first adult doll in his life when he spent all day at home doing nothing and surfing the Internet. “Physically, not too much different from silicone, not bad, solid quite heavy… Then I said, why don’t you buy a cheap one and try it first? It was very exciting at the beginning.

After a period of observation, zhang found that the cheap dolls had a strong smell, “with a smell of stale water”. Time is long, the surface of the baby’s hand is like the cold, to drop slag. “That material is just not good. The stability of that material is too bad.”

In order to learn more about the doll, zhang joined several tieba and forums, among which many netizens’ posts on grooming the doll stirred his heart. When playing with the doll, zhang bo gradually found that the doll is not the same meaning for him. “The doll is actually a person without any temper, even if you unilaterally output, she will not have what reaction.”

Use the way that wait on baby to help you cure, abbreviation “baby cure”. “You can take care of her and dress her up and find something to do, find someone who needs you, and you’ll feel like it’s worthwhile.”

As he browsed the posts and Shared his thoughts, zhang entered a special group: baby friends. He was also impressed by the way they played: many did not use the dolls’ adult functions, preferring instead to dress them up and take them outdoors with them, as Japanese gamers do.

“You can’t go out by yourself the first time.” It takes a great deal of courage to put your “foibles” on display. In order to encourage each other, zhang and several other baby friends planned a special photo shoot at the end of 2015. The first time “take baby” go out, zhang bo a line of people are very nervous. “When you can really get this doll out of here… It’s the same feeling as a naked man running down the street. It takes a lot of courage to get over it.”

Five people, two dolls, swagger to walk in the street, passers-by have sideways. “As soon as you stop at one place to rest your feet, you immediately get a crowd of people who are actually looking at the doll, looking at my face, looking at whether I’m normal or not.”

As they approached the blue harbor, a newspaper reporter approached them. “This elder brother knows very well, come up to say, I still first time see so have a position of baby father offline party, can you take a piece? As soon as I heard this, I said take it. That’s very clear.” In this way, zhang bo finished the first time, is also “the best outside shot”, “quite happy, everyone is very hard, the play of the foot.

A group photo of the first trip

Later, zhang bo took out the previous work to do the operation of the effort, will be a photo re-edit, series into a story, named “small butterfly and uncles a day.” Once the post was published, it spread quickly in the circle, some people worship, some people envy, and some people said that this post will “go down in history”. Everyone’s recognition makes zhang bo realize the unprecedented sense of achievement, to the doll is also increasingly obsessed.

Zhang bo’s post

After the successful photo shoot, zhang spent 15,000 yuan to finally get the first real silicone doll — sakura. Filled with joy, he took the 1.45m tall and 24kg baby home. “At that time open a box, I say good guy, this cross eyebrow cold to thousand husband point, so beauty, so small bodily form, I ponder over, this what person can go to so small body bottom go to a hand, this get many abnormal condition, I say when a small person so keep.”

Zhang bo and xiao ying

Zhang bo from now on in the life of a girl: small cherry. Zhang bo likes to dress her up according to the student’s appearance and put on her school uniform. In his eyes, sakura is the ideal and the reality of the perfect combination of the opposite sex, completely “listen to” in their own, also completely belong to their own. Zhang bo gives her every day to dress up, accompany her in a daze, also can hold her to play games together, make her happy, the emptiness of life is gradually filled up by small cherry.

Zhang bo and xiao ying

That winter, zhang bo decided to take xiaoying out. “I also accompany you so many days, you also accompany me to play once ah, I took small ying to see a movie at that time, go to see warcraft.”

Take “daughter”, buy on two movie tickets, the staff not only did not use strange look at them, “back to our glasses, good”; When going to McDonald’s to have a meal, the aunt that passes by sees small sakura’s hair has a bit bifurcate, take a hairpin to help small sakura clip good hair: “come, wear this good.”

Two people are at the cinema

Taking care of xiao ying as a daughter is also the projection of the relationship between father and son in zhang bo’s real life. When he was young, zhang bo was neglected by his parents. They work in construction units and come home only once a month. For seven years, zhang bo was left with his grandmother and became a left-behind child.

For the father at the beginning of the practice, zhang bo has been bitter, more than 20 years father and son little communication, after zhang bo raise a baby, the relationship between the two is down to the freezing point. “He has his limitations. From what class had he come in his life step by step? It’s unlikely that people in their 60s have changed much more.”

Wait on the girl

As the elapse of time, small ying’s existence is changing zhang bo father and son’s idea quietly. The old man began to try to accept the new member of the family, and he was occasionally jealous when zhang bo took care of xiao ying. “He said,” I’ll wait on you, you always wait on this little man, “and I said,” I can wait on you, too.” In the process of “raising children” and “being a father”, zhang bo also personally realized that “don’t take charge of don’t know firewood expensive”. “Not to mention the clothes people wear, the clothes the baby wears are quite big consumption. Sometimes I wonder how my mom and dad felt when they paid for my tuition.”

Warm and cold life doll 3

“Dolls don’t solve the problem of loneliness.”

Post after the fire, zhang bo out of control, he began to buy the doll, with the doll outside shot, study the doll. He passed on his knowledge of selecting and assembling dolls to new people, and regularly published his daily life with the dolls. Over time, he became a famous leader in the circle.

One day, zhang bo received a letter from a netizen asking for help. “He’s talking about his girlfriend cheating on him, and then he bought some dolls and wanted to go out with us… Come up with gas, by the way also want to have fun. ‘my ex is not a doll.'”

Zhang bo and the doll

Zhang bo came to his home, a small two-bedroom with five dolls and a golden retriever. The little room looked lively but lifeless. “He was a little nervous when he came out, so I pushed him and he walked on and on. He took several pictures of me. I said it was no use taking pictures of me. I have to take pictures of you. He said, ‘it’s ok, I was a little nervous coming out… It’s good to go out, it’s good to come out. ‘”

Zhang bo and the doll

In fact, behind every silicone doll, there is a hidden story. A widowed old man dressed his doll as his dead wife; A husband and wife have no children, the doll as a daughter; Still have the youth that has serious illness does not want to drag cummer, choose to let a doll accompany him.

Zhang bo was impressed by a boy born in the 1990s. “He was pretty sure it was love at first sight. When he bought the doll, he didn’t want a new head. He just wanted the one he saw in the mall… This part of his face was torn, but he still wanted that one. I helped him and changed it for him. Spend new money on an old doll. It’s very emotional.”

People with dolls

After the boy took the doll home, he kept it carefully, dressed it and put it there, not daring to touch her. But for the zhang bo that lets him get this admire in the heart doll, the boy is at ease however very. “He took the doll to diffuse fair, look for a small table, as soon as kaka I put a pose, you click click take several rounds. He is very happy. Feel ah, have elder brother to accompany, play a play…… I also through this to satisfy my own, I like to have a brother to accompany me to play that kind of happy feeling. It’s just that this time I’m playing my brother, and the best part is being with him.”

People with dolls

Now, the zhang bo that has experience quite to the baby became the product mastermind of silica gel baby manufacturer, he plans to be in this oneself love profession, recover the dignity that loses on the career step by step.

A week ago, zhang bo also brought us good news: he met a fellow “baby friend” girl and tried to date her. “Dolls don’t solve the problem of loneliness because they don’t interact. It’s possible that the more dolls you have, the lonelier you are. It’s communication.”

Adjust the doll

After all these experiences, zhang bo is no longer the emotional young man. This time, he plans to “start with the common language and family background and habits”. “Two people get together, two people like the same, two people speak without communication barriers, is not a good basis for communication? But this is the thing where you talk about what the end result is, I don’t know. She is worth it. For the future, I think it’s worth it to meet her again.”